we write about the things we build and the things we consume
Adam Millican

is some music inappropriate for men?

I recently spent some time with friends going through guilty pleasure music choices, and one of the more striking comments I received was – “I can’t believe you listen to girly music!”. I thought this was a bizarre comment, so I pressed the issue further.

After a few questions I quickly established that the people I was discussing music with (who were in fact female) seemed to be under the impression that music with female lead singers could be described as ‘girly music’, especially if the song happened to be slightly cheesy or pop like.

I asked a few other people and got similar comments, and this whole idea just seems strange to me, so I thought I’d investigate further.


(Is Pink too girly for ‘real men’ to listen to?)


So what is girly music?

So what does the comment ‘girly music’ actually mean? After pressing the issue it became apparent that listening to ‘girly music’ was considered damaging to a man’s masculinity.

To start with, I’m not thrilled about the whole concept of masculinity anyway. It seems to be based on backwards ideas about sex specific roles and attitudes that are founded on old fashioned stereotypes. While I’d say I don’t identify as a ‘masculine sort of guy’ in any way, I wouldn’t go as far as to try and define myself as ‘gender-fluid’ either.



Why can’t I be myself, rather than conforming to sexist, legacy-thinking ideas about how people should act based on their sex? So what if I like listening to Pink or Ariana Grande occasionally?

In short, I’m trying to argue that there are still many ideas that a substantial proportion of the general population believe, that are backwards and stereotyping. People should be able to listen to what they want to without being judged.

Do you agree with me, or do you consider ‘girly music’ off limits to any ‘real man’? Let us know in the comments.



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